Sports Education

In Ian Mcewan’s novel Saturday, the hero’s son, Theo, says to his neurosurgeon father, "When we go on about the big things, the political situation, global warming, world poverty, it all looks really terrible, with nothing getting better, nothing to look forward to. But when I think small, closer in — you know, a girl I’ve just met, or this song we’re going to do with Chas, snowboarding next month, then it looks great. So this is going to be my motto — think small."

I believe Theo’s got the right idea. Too many people are fixated on the ‘big things’— the failures and potential catastrophes of the world we inhabit. As a result, we become increasingly stressed and upset about things over which we have little or no control. Eventually, it becomes harder and harder to enjoy the beautiful life when there is the omnipresent fear that at any moment, it could be snatched away by a terrorist’s bomb or a natural disaster of epic proportions.

But what does this have to do with children playing baseball? Plenty. Let me ask you this: how often do you find yourself sitting through one of your child’s games with a big knot in your stomach? More often than you care to admit, I’m sure. And how often do you think kids find themselves looking forward to or competing in games with an equally big knot in their stomachs? Definitely more often than they should!

Such distressing senti-ments surface frequently when parents focus overly on the big things — championships, awards, scholarships, the World Series, fame and glory. When parents start looking at sport as a means to an end, i.e to bag that great scholarship or career opening, the focus moves away from enjoying the game to what will be achieved by participating in an essentially pleasurable and healthy activity. Kids play because they want to have fun. But parents often get their kids to play because they wish to develop sports prodigies who will win huge brand endorsement contracts. As a result, they start becoming emotional about their child’s baseball game, hallucinate about the coach favouring other kids, the umpire’s wrong decision and worry about their child’s team losing the inter-school competition!

Because parents have little or no control over big ticket events when it comes to their kids’ baseball/cricket/football experiences, my advice to them is to stop thinking big. Stop worrying about the things you can’t control. Instead, start thinking about what you can do to make your kid’s playing experience — and, by extension, your own — more enjoyable and rewarding. Unlike ‘big things’ such as paying for private lessons or sending your kids to the best coaching camps, there are smaller, easier options within every parent’s reach.

Here are some examples of easily accessible options for parents to make their children’s games, sports and athletics experiences more pleasurable and fulfilling.

• Create fun traditions and ceremonies that your kids will remember long after baseball is gone from their lives. Try holding a traditional ‘oiling of the glove’ ceremony to begin each season. Or treat your kids to an ‘official hardest practice session ever’ ice cream sundae splurge.

• Look for the positives in every game experience — and encourage your kids to do the same. So what if your team got blown out 13-1? Wasn’t it great just playing outdoors on a perfect summer day? So, your son’s team lost their best bat due to his father’s job transfer. Now you have a chance to help the team’s second best bat train harder and make up the loss.

• Help your kids enjoy the game through interactions with other children, without being conscious of your presence and the pressure it creates.

• Consciously view the time spent on baseball —attending games, driving kids to and from practice, working in the concession stand, etc — as an opportunity to build and strengthen relationships. In the aftermath of all the tragedies we’ve witnessed in the past few years, the thing that stands out most in my mind is how vital human connections are to our general well-being. They mean the most to us. So don’t just view sport as an opportunity for your children to win honours, or pay for college or keep themselves busy after school. Look at it as a chance to expand and develop your circle of connections, both for yourself and your children. Take your parents along to watch your kids’ games. The kids will love it, as will their grandparents.

The small pleasures of life don’t require great expenditure of money or effort. And yet, the payoffs they can yield could be huge. So next time you find yourself sitting in the stands with a knot in your stomach the size of Texas, remember to think small. Enjoy the moment for what it is; don’t focus excessively on the end result. Your kids are having fun playing; you’re having a great time in the outdoors, away from work pressures. The sun is out and all’s well with the world!

Focus on things that are within your control, and let the rest go. Then, like Theo, you will discover that good things really do come in small packages.

(Dr. George Selleck is a California-based sports psychologist and advisor to Sportz Village, Bangalore)